Tinder Made Mij Depressed: Why The Dating App Is Bad For Your Feelings

Delfina Utomo

Yeah, the dating app itself might have bot upgraded, adding ter a few more features like a “Super Like” (self explanatory) and a “Rewind” option (because sometimes our thumbs think quicker than our brains) for budding paramours and daters te the digital world of romance, but is it truly effective?

According to the Internet, yes it might. A quick search could showcase you a handful of Tinder success stories that will make you believe ter love and tales of people getting married after meeting on Tinder. Aww, lovely but not indeed. You’d have to tell people ter the future that you picked your spouse from a sushi stortplaats of damsels and guys — how romantic is that? (Response: no)

But scepticism aside, while Tinder might work for some people, it might not be for everyone.

Photo Credit: Christina Lu via Buzzfeed

Is It Actual Life Or Is It Just Fantasy

“I commenced Tinder spil a social experiment” is what a lotsbestemming of people tell you when they download the app. And like everyone, social media manager Darren got on the Tinder bandwagon to meet people and potential dates with similar music tastes. Hopeful and excited, he frequently logged on the app whenever he could to swipe around, reading other people’s bios intently and going through their photos before determining if he wasgoed going left or right.

He’d look forward to waking up the next day with a list of matches and deliberate a little before initiating conversation, mostly asking about their music tastes. He did it for about a week before he felt that the routine wasgoed beginning to bite hard.

“Most of the time I embark out asking them what they’re listening to, or an album they like and their replies — usually one liners — make it difficult to proceed the conversation. It always feels like a one-sided conversation,” Darren says, “It feels like a very prolonged session of puny talk which I hate.”

What wasgoed most disappointing, he said, wasgoed that the failed conversations from his matches just spurred him to do more swiping, this time without going through the bios but just by judging the photos to widen his pool. There wasgoed just no sense of progress being on Tinder.

Picture Credit: recode.nipt

After weeks of this routine, Darren leisurely began to lose rente ter the following up and swiping — and began to grow resigned and detached. His hopes of finding true romance on the toneel backfired and he wasgoed back to what he did on Tinder B.C. — single without any dating prospects, and a touch of sadness. “I got fairly disheartened, considering that I commenced out on Tinder to meet like-minded musicheads, got sucked te with the dating and romance angle Tinder wasgoed selling and then now Tinder made mij depressed,” he admitted.

Wrong Channel

For copywriter Marianne, however, Tinder did not leave a fat influence on hier life. “I think people get it wrong. People get on Tinder to date, to meet their future gf, or wifey. They want to lodge down with the very first person they kasstuk the right chord with. And that’s how people use Tinder wrong,” she says confidently.

For Marianne, she wasgoed unfazed when all hier friends got on the dating app preoccupied with the notion of finding love. She readily joined the app but set herself a few rules. “I only swipe right for DJs, club owners and bartenders,” she said. Why? The perks, she explains, from getting a free pass to a voorstelling, free entry at clubs, to free drinks at the buffet. “Sometimes they know also lah that I’m sort of using them but nothing bad has everzwijn happened actually,” she exposes.

“I turn down to let an app dictate my love life. If I desired a bf, I’d go out and meet people te efectivo life, not through a phone screen,” Marianne states.

Bad Advertising

“Another problem I have [with] Tinder is how badly people ‘advertise’ themselves there,” Darren says, demonstrating mij some of the profiles he came across. Grainy selfies were the vaandel, and so wasgoed bad lighting, bios that were jibberish, distasteful photos and bland bios — there were pages and pages of thesis. “How do you expect mij to keep positive going through so many profiles like this? I would think they’d at least waterput an effort ter the writing part,” he adds.

While it’s effortless to go on record and say that Tinder gargles, and didn’t work for you, let’s just take a step back. Ter the age of advanced technology, wij’ve become so good at looking for relationships through apps like Tinder and its zuigeling, but so bad at being ter relationships. There’re fresh age duo problems like FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out), trust issues, perverse mind games, manipulative behaviour and more.

Pic Credit: Twitter

Perhaps it’s time to concentrate less on deceptive pictures and one-line bios, and commit to finding someone based on collective interests. Go to the gym, go to after work mixers, talk to people at the supermarket and cafes, meet friends of friends, go to gallery openings, get rejected te efectivo life, go out there and fail — practice patience, understanding, listening, and relationship abilities. Then maybe you’ll find something good.

Or you know, be voor at Tinder and never have your heart cracked by bimbo boys and damsels who never reply you.

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